Our Renunciation of Christ

Robert Leinweber. Peter’s denial. Photo: wikipedia.org     

And they that had laid hold on Jesus led Him away to Caiaphas the high priest, where the scribes and the elders were assembled. But Peter followed Him afar off unto the high priest’s palace, and went in, and sat with the servants, to see the end. Now the chief priests, and elders, and all the council, sought false witness against Jesus, to put Him to death; But found none: yea, though many false witnesses came, yet found they none. At the last came two false witnesses, And said, This fellow said, I am able to destroy the temple of God, and to build it in three days. And the high priest arose, and said unto Him, Answerest Thou nothing? what is it which these witness against Thee? But Jesus held His peace, And the high priest answered and said unto Him, I adjure thee by the living God, that Thou tell us whether Thou be the Christ, the Son of God. Jesus saith unto him, Thou hast said: nevertheless I say unto you, Hereafter shall ye see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power, and coming in the clouds of heaven. Then the high priest rent his clothes, saying, He hath spoken blasphemy; what further need have we of witnesses? behold, now ye have heard His blasphemy. What think ye? They answered and said, He is guilty of death. Then did they spit in His face, and buffeted Him; and others smote Him with the palms of their hands, Saying, Prophesy unto us, Thou Christ, Who is he that smote Thee? Now Peter sat without in the palace: and a damsel came unto him, saying, Thou also wast with Jesus of Galilee. But he denied before them all, saying, I know not what thou sayest. And when he was gone out into the porch, another maid saw him, and said unto them that were there, This fellow was also with Jesus of Nazareth. And again he denied with an oath, I do not know the man. And after a while came unto him they that stood by, and said to Peter, Surely thou also art one of them; for thy speech betrayeth thee. Then began he to curse and to swear, saying, I know not the man. And immediately the cock crew. And Peter remembered the word of Jesus, which said unto him, Before the cock crow, thou shalt deny Me thrice. And he went out, and wept bitterly (Matt. 26:57–75).

The divine service for this night is deeply touching. The Gospel readings of this service are highly edifying. Let us extract from them at least one piece of edification from the story of Peter’s renunciation.

Peter, the preeminent Apostle, renounced his Teacher and Lord, renounced the One for Whom, as he said not long prior, he was ready to go to death (Lk. 22:33); and he renounced Him, afraid of being accused by a handmaid of belonging to the disciples of Christ, as though it were some criminal or shameful thing. But as great as was the fall of the preeminent Apostle, so sincere and great was his repentance. He immediately realized the sinfulness of his deed and went out and wept bitterly. He spent the rest of his life washing away his sin with tears of repentance. There’s a tradition that after that, the holy Apostle Peter woke up every night at the cock’s crow and wept, recalling his sin; such weeping caused his eyes to always be pained.

But do we not, beloved, sometimes renounce our Lord in an even more cowardly manner? Moreover, do we not renounce Him when no danger threatens us, unlike Peter? Do we not renounce Him every year, every day, sometimes for the most insignificant reasons? Peter renounced Christ and then bitterly mourned his renunciation. But we renounce Him and don’t feel bad about it. At Baptism, a cross was placed upon every one of us as a sign of our faith in Him Who was crucified for us on the Cross and as a witness to our readiness to follow Him, bearing our cross of sorrows, sufferings, and hardships. Is this sign intact? Do we always wear our cross? To the contrary, have not many Christians cast off this sign of salvation as a sign of supposed superstition, out of cowardice or even simply out of carelessness?

According to the custom inherited from the Fathers and adopted by the Apostles, good Christians pray before taking any food, asking for God’s blessing, and after taking food they thank God for the gifts of His grace. Is this done at our meals? Does anyone pray before taking food? I won’t answer this question—let each one’s conscience speak. Let it convict the guilty of the sin of apostasy from the ancient customs of faith. Those who eat without prayer do so either out of carelessness or cowardice, fearing that the sons of this evil world will call them either hypocrite or backwards for fulfilling the Church’s customs in this way. Our age, rushing forward headlong, strives away from, not towards Christ. Therefore those who remain with Christ seem to lag behind this age. Is it not because of such cowardly shame that many in our modern society don’t go to God’s churches, are absent from church services, while not only are none of them not ashamed to go to theaters, circuses, and other amusing spectacles, but consider staying at home, as a deviation from the customs of this age, a sign of backwardness?

Many of us read lots of books, many of which are devoid of content, and sometimes so immoral that good parents don’t give them to their children to read. And these books are laid out in prominent places, on our tables, in our living rooms. But you won’t find there the holiest of books—the Gospel—or any other book of a spiritual or moral character. Why? Because the master of the house is afraid that someone will see the Gospel or a similar book and say to him: “And you are with Jesus, for your conversation with this book betrays you!” (Mt. 26:73). But if we listen to the content of our conversations in our families, in our circle of friends, or in public gatherings, we’ll see the same emptiness, vanity, and the same cowardice regarding matters of faith. Sometimes they discuss the most mundane, the most trivial subjects with all seriousness; but let someone try to start a conversation about matters of faith, morality, or the upbringing of children, or mention the name of Christ, and there immediately follows either an ambiguous silence or sneering glances at the man who started such a conversation.

Is it not cowardice that also keeps a certain class of people from fulfilling the most sacred duty of Confession and Communion of the Holy Mysteries? And among those who fulfill this duty, there are many who, through their manner of fasting and preparation for Communion, seem to want to show that they’re fulfilling this as a difficult and unpleasant obligation; therefore, during this time they appear gloomy, indifferent to all Church matters, always late and approaching the most holy Sacrament without preparation, without proper reverence. This goes beyond denial of Christ; it is a mockery of Him.

Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak, the Lord tells the Apostles (Mt. 26:41). And we too, brethren, must pray that we might not fall into adversity. Peter fell, but repented and washed away his fall with tears: And he went out, and wept bitterly. But we sin and don’t grieve. “What’s this?” some will say. “The times have changed: Now there is freedom for everyone in everything.” Pitiful freedom! It leads to bitter slavery—slavery to sin and the prince of this world. Others say: “This happened before and passed—it will pass now, too.” We mustn’t speak like this. We can say about the past that it has passed, but as for the future, we can’t guarantee that it will pass. Those who add sin to sin forget that by repeating sins like this they are weaving a rope that will be the instrument of their suicide, as it was for the ill-fated Judas. The more often we repeat a sin, the more difficult it is to repent. Aren’t those who commit suicide of all kinds people like this? And don’t such people typically die without repentance? Let us pray: “Our Father!… Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.”