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'Kind of F****d Me Up': Husband Shaken After Euthanizing Wife's Pet Fish

The internet was stunned after one husband described his failed attempt at putting his wife’s sickly goldfish out of its misery in a popular internet forum.

In a viral post published on Reddit’s r/tifu, short for “Today I F****d Up,” the husband explained how he euthanized the fish, and detailed the events that led to bits of fish being strewn about his house. Titled, “TIFU by obliterating my wife’s fish,” the Reddit post has received more than 40,000 votes and nearly 2,500 comments in just seven hours.

Explaining that the 8-year-old goldfish had recently fallen ill, the viral post’s author said that after the couple accepted that it was nearing death, his wife asked him to euthanize the fish. After some research, he said he called back to his time as a youth fisherman when deciding how to carry out the grisly deed.

“When I was a kid my family were huge anglers, and I was designated as the fish killer when it was time to cook them,” he wrote. “Back then, I was told to slam them on the ground as hard as I could.”

“Honestly it kind of f****d me up a little,” he added.

Employing the same strategy on the ill goldfish, the husband said that he put the fish in a plastic grocery bag and slammed it on a kitchen counter. Unfortunately, the bag was unable to contain its contents.

One Redditor said he was tasked with euthanizing his wife’s sick goldfish, but made a crucial mistake during the process.
mgritchie/iStock / Getty Images Plus

“The force ripped open the bag and sprayed bits of what used to be a goldfish in every direction,” the Redditor wrote. “On the counter, on the stove, on the fridge, on the freaking Christmas tree we still have up, I was still finding pieces of it this morning.”

According to Fish Lab, blunt force trauma is considered a humane way to euthanize an already-dying pet fish. However, there is more to the process than simply slamming a fish on a counter or hitting it with a blunt object.

After using blunt force trauma, Fish Lab recommends fish owners use a knife to slice through the fish’s brain in a procedure called pithing.

Following euthanization, online pet supply retailer Chewy maintains that it is pivotal that fish are disposed of properly. Although flushing a dead fish has long served as a common disposal method, multiple online resources for pet owners consider the practice inhumane, and have warned about the potential dangers of exposing healthy fish to diseases from dead fish.

While the Redditor’s grocery bag strategy resulted in a gruesome kitchen scene and a wife who was “aghast and traumatized,” commenters responding to the viral post attempted to shed light on the situation, and agreed that the husband’s intentions were not to brutalize a sickly fish.

In the post’s top comment, which has received over 13,000 votes, Redditor u/linknt01 attempted to find a silver lining, and quipped that the goldfish will remain in the Redditor’s house permanently.

“On the plus side, a piece of your beloved goldfish will live on with you forever,” they commented.

Redditor u/kaleidosocope_view, whose comment has received more than 4,000 votes, added that the fish died in what they called honorable fashion.

“Welp, it died a warrior’s death,” they wrote.


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