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By TLB Contributing Writer: Ken LaRive
An understanding of love seems to be very important in a world mostly void of the concept. Most people profess to have a loving spirit, and yet they fall short with even the most fundamental everyday decisions. I won’t go into the number of children born out of wedlock, the number of abortions performed every day, or even the number of divorces here in America, that would prove this point. Is the number of men who resist paying child support an indicator of love? Or the man on death row for killing his unfaithful girlfriend who said, “I didn’t know I loved her so much.
Perhaps the reason love is so misunderstood is because it doesn’t seem evident in real life. Children learn from their parents, and what a joke that is? No, they learn from the black box, music, YouTube, and the movies. They watch a woman hack off the limbs of 300 men with a Katana sword, and felt no trauma at all.
So what is Love anyway? Notice I put a capital L in love. Well, the reason is that it is True Love, the best that Love can be. But what is that? Is it actually a ploy for sex, a cerebral foreplay perhaps? Or is it about empathy? Mmmm, no, feeling sorry for someone does not mean you want to spend your life with them. No, it something stronger, might even be considered a survival technique. Keep the gene pool lit for the most capable of being true blue? It is called Agape’ with a capital A, and it is the ultimate love, a selfless kind.
It is like swimming perhaps, or any sport at all. To be successful you must learn the proper rules of engagement…
Granny and I have loved each other now for about 52 years, and yet each and every day we work to maintain that. I guess Love, True Love, is something like a slowly leaking balloon, a balloon you alone have inflated, and it needs a fresh breath to keep it inflated every day. No one can fill it but you, and many things around you will do anything at all to pop it. True Love is something that needs to be guarded because it is so strong, and valuable. When you have true love in both mind and heart, nothing can harm you unless you let it…
Know that you have to love yourself too, in order to love another, but with Agape’ love you put the needs of that other person before your own. Try to choose another who will do the same… Love can be a balance of emotion and intellect, and that is the more lasting kind. However, there are some who might draw upon your good nature, your loving spirit, and feed on you like a parasite, and in the process creates what is called a toxic relationship. Discard them, and move on. What people are inside, the good and bad and right and wrong, culminated mostly by the time they are four, and you cannot change their fundamental thought process. It is big world, and people of like mind are all around you. Seek them out.
I didn’t understand these concepts when I was young, and I was lucky to find Granny. I knew early on she was good for me, but didn’t know why. I saw in her something I was lacking, I suppose, and that is a bit of what marriage is about. It is like two pieces of the same puzzle, I suppose, and it should balance.
Another important concept to understand is the word responsibility. To me, this might be the most valuable ideal to be understood in your life. The moment you grasp that you alone are responsible for everything this life can offer, the more fulfilling your life will be. Never blame another for a failing you find in yourself. Be thankful that you have the ability to see it, and the potential to understand it, and work to change or build upon it. Seeking Love with responsibility at the core of your standard will release a new freedom in both mind and heart, that cannot be denied by all of the external negativity also vying to incorporate itself in your life. Responsibility is the most solid of framework, a framework that will be lasting and true. Your responsibility for self is something that you will take to your last breath…
Empathy comes from your ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes, and not an easy task to fulfill. When you attempt to understand the motivations of another, you not only grow personally, but you will expand your possibilities in every undertaking you attempt or accomplish in your life. It seems that when you attempt to understand another person, you come closer to understanding yourself, and the reason for this is simple… You will find that most everyone around you has the same basic needs, but they go about their lives seeking to fulfill them in different ways. Everyone needs love, validity, security, food and such, and when you understand this you will see yourself in their eyes…
Another powerful concept is the ability to be thankful. If you do even a quick evaluation of yourself and your life you will find an overwhelming amount to be thankful for. Without that, you will be always searching for more and more fulfillment, and once achieved it will be short lived. Know that there is a difference between happiness and joy, and try to figure that out for yourself. To me, happiness is in the receiving, and joy comes from the giving. Sounds a bit too simple, but it is a powerful concept, and is the root of many of the problems we encounter in this life. Problems that we bring on to ourselves. Joy is far more lasting, and happiness short lived…
Seek the truth, and believe in nothing that cannot be substantiated. Know that corporations, institutions, associations, governments, manufacture products and services, produce food, try to inform and entertain you, and some of it is not for your own good, but for a bottom line, designed to take not only your money, but sometimes your very soul as well. One thing I have continually grappled with my entire life is that everything on this earth does not belong to you, none of it at all. It is all on loan, and nothing you build can you take when you die. We all die, and yet very few have grasped the concept of what a gift it is to be alive. It is a gift from God. Take the time to thank God for everything you are and have in your life.
Telling the truth is not an easy thing to do. I would like to say that you should always tell the truth, but I wonder if that is possible. First off, to me, you are only responsible for your own life, and yet you should attempt to help others too, if you can. I was a bumper sticker the other day that read “do no harm,” and that is a profound statement and food for thought. Sometimes telling the truth might cause more harm than good, and yet you should strive to be an honest and truthful person, who lives by a code of honor.
Finally, I would like you to grapple with the idea of Liberty. Liberty is found inside of you, not outside. Liberty is not just the ability to say no, but the ability to say yes as well. Liberty is not the same as freedom, but has an element that set you free, just as well, responsibility. Liberty is the opposite of slavery, and know that slavery can come in many forms. Beware of anything or anyone who tries to coerce you to follow them, if you have to give up your responsibility to do it. Trust no one with your immortal soul, your sanity, or your dreams.
Try to develop the ability to laugh at yourself. Know that you are not a machine, but a human being, capable of greatness, and failings. Learn from both, and carry them as balance in your live, When one of them weighs you down, pull the other up for examination, you see, without bad thing that happen, you will not understand or appreciate the good when you have it in your hands, And what you have done wrong will stimulate the right you choose.
Perhaps our first bit of advice would be to be very careful who you give your love too, as along with that you are not only giving a part of your heart to them. but a bit of venerability as well. Use your heart and your head in this world, and try to keep them balanced. When you say that you have “fallen in Love.” I hope this was done with both your heart and mind. Let me explain…
It is said that no one can hurt you unless you let them, and that seems very true. I have been taught that the purest form of Love is something called Agape’ Love, and it is a selfless kind. Few around you know this love, unfortunately, and that is the reason there is so much pain from the many forms of duplicity that people use to justify their actions.
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Also by this Author:
KEN’S CORNER: Solitude vs Loneliness
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Read more great articles by Ken LaRive
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From the Author, Ken La Rive – We in the Liberty movement have been fighting to take back this country for less than a decade, peacefully and with the love of God and country in our hearts. Our banner has been trampled on and displaced by a multitude of distractions, further eroding our nation and the cause for Liberty. And so, as we are pulled by forces we cannot fathom, powerful entities with unlimited resources stolen from our future, unaccountable trillions printed out of thin air and put on our backs as debt, we must formulate the most pitiful of all questions any patriot might ask in the final hour: Are we going to fight for our master’s tyranny, or are we going to demand the return of our civil liberties and Constitution? Are we going to choose The Banner of Liberty, or the shackles of voluntary servitude? Will it be a war for corporate profit, or a war to regain our ability to self govern, as the blood and toil of our forefathers presented to us, their children, as a gift? I fear that decision is emanate. I fear that any decision will be a hard one, but my greatest fear of all is that the decision has already been made for us.
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